


Casting Shadows

by Swashbuckler



Category: DCU, DCU (Comics), The Flash (Comics)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Angst with a more positive outlook at the ending, Bitterness, Character Study, Friendship, Gen, Identity Issues, Insecurity, Jealousy, Misunderstandings, Or at least reliable but coloured by personal bias and interpretation, Self-Esteem Issues, Sort Of, Teen Angst, Unreliable Narrator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-04-17
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:15:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23700676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Swashbuckler/pseuds/Swashbuckler
Summary: Axel and Billy reflect on their perceptions of one another.
Comments: 10
Kudos: 20





	Casting Shadows

Billy Hong is made of sunshine and Axel Walker hates his guts.

It's not fair. Billy has everything. Not only is he overflowing with godlike power, as if that wasn't enough, he is James Jesse's son. His actual son, his real-life legacy, not some scrappy teenager who stole his stuff and had to demand to be taken seriously. 

The Rogues want him there. They actually want him there. It's not hard to tell. They scrub Billy's hair and joke about how tall he's got, laughing about he just couldn't be James' son, _like James could ever help make someone this cute!_ They want Billy with a warmth that he had to fight for and still hasn't really got. Not like Billy has. Maybe that makes the respect he's finally got worth more: his wasn't cheap - his was earnt. It doesn't feel like it though. 

Billy always takes their praise with perfect humility and a smile that makes the girls fawn and skin that looks like it's never even heard of acne and Axel feels so horribly small.

He doesn't even actually hate him for it. He can't. He's so kind to everyone, even him when he's an ass. He's trusting and patient and forgiving and just so good. So unbelievably, yet so undeniably, good.

And so he's just waiting for the day the Rogues chuck him out and the title of Trickster is taken from him and given to who they really think deserves it. 

He will never be good enough.

* * *

Billy can tell Axel doesn't like him very much.

It's not hard to figure out why; he might not be as good at reading people as his dad was, but he doesn't need to be to see that Axel is painfully, bitterly jealous of him. 

He gets it, he does. Axel idolises James like everyone expects him to; after all, he is his son.

The Rogues look at him and see James' son, and expect another Rogue by default. And he loves his dad, and he loves them too, but he's as much his mother's son as his father's, if not more. 

He doesn't want to be the Trickster. 

Axel does. Axel is. Axel doesn't want to lose it as much as Billy doesn't want to be it. He's good at it, too. Axel's quick and clever, not that he'd ever boast it. Maybe because no one's ever told him he is. Billy's seen the way he's reinvented his dad's old toys and tricks, pushed them to their limit in great feats of ingenuity that he's learnt and perfected through sheer determination and it's admirable. Axel might not believe him if he told him how good he is but it's there. He can see it.

And that's not all Billy sees. 

He sees how Lashawn lights up when Axel goads her into play-fighting, poking and prodding her with his gloved hands. Axel doesn't realise how much she cherishes being treated like anyone else when he refuses to be afraid of her powers and in turn it encourages her not to be either. 

Neither does Axel see the fondness on Owen's face when he launches himself up onto his back, locking his arms around his neck and cheering him onwards.

_"I will drop you."_

_"You would never!"_

And it's true; Billy has grown to know Owen well enough to know that he would never drop the boy he thinks of as a baby brother.

Axel doesn't know how just much Jerrie appreciated him crashing the debutante ball she had been dreading for her. Billy and the others had listened to Jerrie's delighted retelling of how Axel had burst in armed with powder paint and glitter to the horror of high-society, and how he'd given her a chance to escape in the chaos and a newly colourful dress.

But it hadn't been the feat of Roguedom that she had appreciated most. After escaping the party, Axel had taken her to get drive-thru from a tacky fast food joint her parents would never allow. They had sat together in his car in the empty parking lot covered in paint and glitter and eating cheap, greasy food.

_"It was disgusting," Jerrie had beamed. "I loved it."_

And while Axel holds baby Josh like anyone else would hold a bomb, that doesn't stop him pulling silly faces at him when he cries, crouching and popping up over the edge of his pram to try and soothe his grizzling.

Axel is clever and brilliant and a fantastic Trickster, but he is a better friend. Billy hopes that one day he will see that.


End file.
